Showing posts with label Holidaze. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Holidaze. Show all posts
12/25/2014
2014. Still A Week Left To Break Those Resolutions Before 2015
Hello,
Did you have a good year? Was it a very good year? Are you sad to see 2015 so sudden on the horizon? Ehhhh. Either way you can't stop time from keeping the present just out of reach. The future seems further away the older I get; It is the past which becomes more of me each year I sputter through. 2014 was a great year for Juicebox Thoughts. Not necessarily in a fiduciary sense, but 2014 was abundantly renumerative. Socially, sextually and soberly. The highlights? Our 1 year anniversary, T. Martin joining the team, the fact that CCGB? Studios posted something online almost every day for a year straight?
. Juiceboxthoughts.com is the website address now, So in good faith we shall endeavor 2 return more than 2014's surplus to you, our neighbors in our community. Are there any bums reading this note out there? It's Dollar bills Im giving when you ask for change next year, no more pennies or black dimes. (Well maybe just the first half of the year). And this offer goes for the downtown cray cray ladies, who somehow seem old but I just know are younger than me. So I got the bums and the cray crays...
Who u got?
Did you have a good year? Was it a very good year? Are you sad to see 2015 so sudden on the horizon? Ehhhh. Either way you can't stop time from keeping the present just out of reach. The future seems further away the older I get; It is the past which becomes more of me each year I sputter through. 2014 was a great year for Juicebox Thoughts. Not necessarily in a fiduciary sense, but 2014 was abundantly renumerative. Socially, sextually and soberly. The highlights? Our 1 year anniversary, T. Martin joining the team, the fact that CCGB? Studios posted something online almost every day for a year straight?
. Juiceboxthoughts.com is the website address now, So in good faith we shall endeavor 2 return more than 2014's surplus to you, our neighbors in our community. Are there any bums reading this note out there? It's Dollar bills Im giving when you ask for change next year, no more pennies or black dimes. (Well maybe just the first half of the year). And this offer goes for the downtown cray cray ladies, who somehow seem old but I just know are younger than me. So I got the bums and the cray crays...
Who u got?
Merry Christmas!!!
12/21/2014
Too Lazy 2 Browse Target's Toy Aisles IRL? We Did It 4 You! Only 3 Days Left...
People- Christmas is here. Wait. Lets try that one again.
Christmas is Here! No? I guess For those of you who have finished shopping, Christmas might already be over. But I know there's a lot of us who have not even begun to shop yet. For us folks, Christmas is still in the hazy distant future of not today and probably not tomorrow either. I am here to help out my fellow time managementally challenged brethren by letting you know that Christmas is only four days away. So start shopping now.
Ross dress for less stores might be open Christmas eve, but your mother might not want a fossil watch and a 16 month SI swimsuit calendar... At least mine didn't. You can start shopping now without even going to a store. Just watch this video. This video shows every single toy that is on sale at Target. Yep. You can Eye before you Buy!
Nope. Sorry. This video does not in fact show every single toy. I had to take that one down because of P.E.T.A online petitions. Man those things pack a punch! So just watch and be content you didnt just waste a shopping day.
Christmas is Here! No? I guess For those of you who have finished shopping, Christmas might already be over. But I know there's a lot of us who have not even begun to shop yet. For us folks, Christmas is still in the hazy distant future of not today and probably not tomorrow either. I am here to help out my fellow time managementally challenged brethren by letting you know that Christmas is only four days away. So start shopping now.
Ross dress for less stores might be open Christmas eve, but your mother might not want a fossil watch and a 16 month SI swimsuit calendar... At least mine didn't. You can start shopping now without even going to a store. Just watch this video. This video shows every single toy that is on sale at Target. Yep. You can Eye before you Buy!
Nope. Sorry. This video does not in fact show every single toy. I had to take that one down because of P.E.T.A online petitions. Man those things pack a punch! So just watch and be content you didnt just waste a shopping day.
11/27/2014
10/29/2014
The Day I Rescued A Kittycat Named Oprah
Yes, I did indeed, rescue the poor kitty from way up in the tree...
6/03/2014
Devil v. America- A Mr. Dr. Demo Track.
June finds MISTERDOCTER in a patriotic mindset this year it seems... Enjoy the harmonies and relish the delicate dischord only a demo track can provide...
And yes, Mr. Dr. assured me that an Actual Boomvie for the completed track will be coming.
Soon?
I had to ask...
Sometime this month he said. Before the girl's next birthday.
Soon?
I had to ask...
Sometime this month he said. Before the girl's next birthday.
5/22/2014
I Used 2 Loooooove The Strokes!
No really. From 2001 until about 2007 I loved The Strokes unflinchingly. I Loved their albums. Loved their tones. Loved their hair and I Loved their attitude, or lack thereof. I loved their name. But Now? I'd like to blame their most recent, and perhaps final album, for my sense of unease bordering on Motherfucking Fear whenever I hear their name. Said album, 2013's comically and yet exactly aptly titled '80’s Comedown Machine' is not a great or even very good album, but it's also not the disaster most critics declared it to be. I like track 2 'All the Time' and the whole thing is barely 40 minutes long, which brings to mind the old aphorism oft repeated about Colorado weather and almost all Punk Rock songs. If you don't like the rain or that grating bass line?... just wait a minute. Things will change quickly.
Ouch.
So my closest male elder relative had a bad Monday last week. No make that a terribly bad Monday. He Suffered A... Hold on, He Endured? Or Had? Was attacked? No. He Was Stroked. He Maintained a Stroke? None of it sounds right because I'm still me and he is still mentally he, but this Stroke is our new normal. Our Monolith. But our Monolith didn't suddenly appear way out by Jupiter. It is right beside us, worming its way inside us, an unwanted Big Fucking Deal. Our Stroke Monolith. Ten days in, can I now consider it a Stroke of luck that he survived and wasn't just struck out?
His was/is an atypical stroke, one caused by a hemmorage in the brain rather than a clot. Imagine, one moment is spent sitting in an overstuffed easychair, relaxing in the lobby of a client's building. Another moment, not so distinct or identifiable as the next moment, but a later moment, part of his right leg decides that now is the time to take up Astral Projection. With the brained, unseeable aspect of his right leg having jumped ship, his physical leg may as well belong to the overstuffed easychair in which he sits. Because he cannot get up! And the leg is no longer responsive to the millions of increasingly frantic signals his brain is firing off.
And so this Stroke is a '70’s Comedown Machine'. And it too is comically exactly, aptly titled. For this is his 70th year on earth, and I would not attempt a more perfect definition for a stroke than 'Comedown Machine'. The last ten days have been sneaky subtle. They have been slow to differentiate themselves in our new normal. I can't discern any change in his condition from a week ago. The Doctors will not operate and I will not pray.
Ouch.
But this morning? My father, who is nothing like Darth Vader, this morning my father used the Force. And he used Apple iMessage. But mainly he used the Force.
Yep. Six inches of movement became monumental. Six inches was more magnificent than the breadth of the mighty Mississippi.
The kicker.
When I received this video iMessage I was lollygagging in bed, listening to music, pretending to be getting ready for the train ride to visit him at the hospital. It wasn't until after I watched the video twice that I realized what I had just seen. The immutable was muted. The leg had returned, even if just for a six inch visit. It took me another twenty seconds to bestir myself and realize what the ipod was playing on shuffle. It was the title track to The Strokes 2013 album '80's Comedown Machine'. Fuck it. I gotta keep loving The Strokes.
Ouch.
So my closest male elder relative had a bad Monday last week. No make that a terribly bad Monday. He Suffered A... Hold on, He Endured? Or Had? Was attacked? No. He Was Stroked. He Maintained a Stroke? None of it sounds right because I'm still me and he is still mentally he, but this Stroke is our new normal. Our Monolith. But our Monolith didn't suddenly appear way out by Jupiter. It is right beside us, worming its way inside us, an unwanted Big Fucking Deal. Our Stroke Monolith. Ten days in, can I now consider it a Stroke of luck that he survived and wasn't just struck out?
His was/is an atypical stroke, one caused by a hemmorage in the brain rather than a clot. Imagine, one moment is spent sitting in an overstuffed easychair, relaxing in the lobby of a client's building. Another moment, not so distinct or identifiable as the next moment, but a later moment, part of his right leg decides that now is the time to take up Astral Projection. With the brained, unseeable aspect of his right leg having jumped ship, his physical leg may as well belong to the overstuffed easychair in which he sits. Because he cannot get up! And the leg is no longer responsive to the millions of increasingly frantic signals his brain is firing off.
And so this Stroke is a '70’s Comedown Machine'. And it too is comically exactly, aptly titled. For this is his 70th year on earth, and I would not attempt a more perfect definition for a stroke than 'Comedown Machine'. The last ten days have been sneaky subtle. They have been slow to differentiate themselves in our new normal. I can't discern any change in his condition from a week ago. The Doctors will not operate and I will not pray.
Ouch.
But this morning? My father, who is nothing like Darth Vader, this morning my father used the Force. And he used Apple iMessage. But mainly he used the Force.
Yep. Six inches of movement became monumental. Six inches was more magnificent than the breadth of the mighty Mississippi.
The kicker.
When I received this video iMessage I was lollygagging in bed, listening to music, pretending to be getting ready for the train ride to visit him at the hospital. It wasn't until after I watched the video twice that I realized what I had just seen. The immutable was muted. The leg had returned, even if just for a six inch visit. It took me another twenty seconds to bestir myself and realize what the ipod was playing on shuffle. It was the title track to The Strokes 2013 album '80's Comedown Machine'. Fuck it. I gotta keep loving The Strokes.
1/03/2014
Happy (real) New Year's Day!!!
Happy New Year everybody!
But wait you say, today is January 4th! Aren't you either a little late or extremely premature in wishing us all a Happy New Year? Well actually, I'm not. Today January 4th, is really January 1st.
Little known fact: Our 21st President, Chester A. Arthur, was the man pulling the strings in this calendrical hoo-ha. Upon President Garfield's death from assassination the morning of September 19 1881, President Arthur declared three national days of mourning. They were to take place September 20, 21 and 22. There was only one problem. Arthur didn't take the oath of office until the mourning period ended on the evening of the 22nd. His advisers explained that because of the three day lapse in succession, our new President was not Chester A. Arthur. Instead our President was Flopsom Mollie, a notch eared terrier who was previously the Garfield family pet! Garfield, strange old biddy that he was, declared in his will that if no oath of office was taken to succeed him within 72 hours of his passing, the presidency would pass to flatulent old Flopsom Mollie... Constitution be damned!
Neither Congress nor the Court could figure a way out of this mess, and it soon began to set in that our great country was now 'one nation under dog'. And so for three dark days our Capital was at a standstill, with some members of the Whig party threatening to support President Flopsom Mollie's legislative agenda, such as it was... Which really wasn't much.
But thank the Heavens for Arthur's good sense! The night of the 24th he made a pre-executive decision that changed history forever. He summoned all the newspaper editors to the White House and prepared an official telegram to go out to the rest of the press. The official transcript to this telegram has sadly been lost to history, but suffice it to say that when America woke up the morning of September 25th and read their morning papers everything had changed. Arthur had ordered them to change the date back three days to September 22nd. Reprinting every bit of news exactly the same as they had three days prior but with one important change. They would include a story about President Arthur taking the oath of office the night before, the evening of September 21st. Thus invalidating Garfield's cruel whim of a will and making sure a white man was once again our President of these United States. So you see, when I say today is actually January 1st...
Oh shit.
Nevermind.
Fucking math!
Again!
Goddammit!!!
See today is really January 7th because Arthur went back three days...
Oh fuck it!
Happy New Year!
12/07/2013
I think I've discovered a new holiday tradition...
(Do not click this link if under 21 or easily kerfuffled)
Merry Xmas Everyone!!!
A not so safe for work tradition tis true, but a fine tradition nonetheless...
11/10/2013
Thanksgiving or not, there's no avoiding a birthday...
Yep. A crocodile's tear away from spanning 5 decades on our planet. I think I have the math right on that one. Allons-y!
- Alors, Thanksgiving de cette année, je me tourne âgé de 39 ans. J'ai dû avouer ce fait en français, parce que j'ai peur de google. C'est vrai. C'est très très vrai.
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